So am I blue? Yes, but that may have more to do with Cyanosis? Or am I pleased at what at this present moment is the achievement of reverting back to the stage of underachievement from a stage even worse than that?
Okay, so I’m not quite sure what I’m supposed to feel? You see, I have managed to drop the 2lbs I put on last week, but that just puts me back to exactly where I was when I was scraping my morale up off the floor two weeks prior? Some optimists may say “just count your losses!” which would be apt had there actually been any? I was also advised to “look on the bright side” by one particularly patronising aloof (yes that’s right, I’m nouning that bad-boy (Oh and verbingnoun..and verb? Okay this could go on for far too long)).
So am I blue? Yes, but that may have more to do with Cyanosis? Or am I pleased at what at this present moment is the achievement of reverting back to the stage of underachievement from a stage even worse than that? I don’t know if there is an adjective fitting for the occasion to be honest, but for now I’m going to settle with being…erm…I haven’t quite thought this through?! I know; have you ever had a really soul sucking day at your Oxbridge-piquet-playing-ethnicity-fearing-pretend-philanthropist relatives house, that really shines a light on the sheer distance between their version of success and you? But then found just the right amount of change in your car for the drive-through on the way home?THAT feeling.
Still, this underdog must rise again to wage her war against her food faux pas for another day! Wait, are you an an underdog if you aren’t actually succeeding, or faux pas if it’s less the odd slip and more on the Verrückt?
Oh, side note, for this next week I WILL be exercising portion control at meal times by, wait for it, the novel idea of “portion control” at meal times! Yes, apparently smaller crockery holds less food? I care to test this “theory” *said in the same tone my Oxbridge-piquet-playing-ethnicity-fearing-pretend-philanthropist relatives use when they talk to me*, over in the “If Only it” section so let’s see what happens with that!