If You Grew Up In An Abusive and/or Dysfunctional, “Toxic” Environment (Whether You Are Aware of This Or Not), You May Believe a Whole Lot of Old Lies About Yourself That Are Impeding Your Success Over and Over Again Today. Here’s Why…
Many of us learn to hide our true self behind a mask…
Did You Grow Up In A Turbulent, Chaotic, Non-Nurturing Environment?
Children who grew up in chaotic, non-nurturing environments that failed to lovingly and positively mirror their natural, spontaneous expressions may have gradually disconnected from their true self, i.e., the most pure, innate, natural, free, and intensely alive aspect of their being so as to conform to the expectations of others around them – especially their primary caregivers and/or the ‘power-holders’ in their original family system. This disconnection from their primal, core ‘true self’ was a means of ‘getting by’ and emotionally surviving their original family system. As adults, such individuals may have no idea that they have disconnected from a most precious aspect of their core nature, but may experience anxiety, addiction, depression, and other symptoms that are ultimately rooted in childhood. However, it is never too late for such an adult to recover, embrace, and embody their authentic, true self nature so as to reclaim and more fully realize who and what they most truly are at the most basic, fundamental level so as to live in a more emotionally honest, authentic, expansive, energized, and awakened manner.
The Hidden Wounds of Psychological / Emotional Abuse
Psychological/Emotional abuse experienced in childhood can be insidious: It is insidious because the adult survivor is often unaware that they were in fact victims of abuse, and therefore may not ever seek help or treatment for the invisible psychological and emotional wounds sustained. When healthy mental and emotional functioning is impaired, such an adult is at high risk of developing a variety of mood disorders, addictive behaviors, and other maladaptive ways of being in the world in his or her subconscious attempts to navigate around the pain of an injured psyche.
This type of mental / emotional abuse or neglect, when repetitive and/or chronic, results in the child unconsciously believing that he or she is faulty, damaged, and unworthy of love, empathy, attention, and respect. Such children typically strive life-long to be accepted and approved of by others as a means of proving to themselves that they are ‘okay’ and worthy of love. Having little self-worth, adult survivors of child abuse often find themselves in neglectful, even abusive relationships despite their best intentions to find happiness and love.
In the event that an adult who grew up in such a non-nurturing, non-supportive environment does for some reason seek the help of a Mental Heath professional, such as a licensed psychotherapist, they still may not receive the psycho-education and targeted support that they so desperately need to recover from abuse they experienced while young. This is especially likely if the childhood wounds remain entirely unrecognized and go unreported by the client, and/or the therapist unconsciously colludes with their client to prevent the painful material from arising in session (this is especially likely if the therapist has repressed childhood wounding of their own). Successful treatment and recovery from this particular form of child abuse is especially challenging in that the adult survivor in therapy may still be experiencing mental / emotional abuse as a consequence of wanting to remain connected to those who continue to abuse them (most commonly the parents).
To learn more about how false, core beliefs about yourself may be sabotaging your success today, refer to my Ezine article The Invisible Wounds Of Psycho-Emotional Child Abuse. Next, read my article My Ten Strategies To Help You Live and Speak Your Truth for some quick tips on how to start living more authentically and in a ‘true self’-empowered manner, starting today. You are also welcome to join the ChainFree Living Online Discussion Group & Forum where I provide tools, resources, and facilitate peer-support driven topics on recovering and reclaiming the the true self (forum participation is free; however you must register as a member before you can create and comment on topics. There is no charge for registration).
Rebecca C. Mandeville, MA, MACP, MFT