This is my opinion on the type of people we are bound to and the reasons that we are bound to them kind of people. It all comes down to one thing, we all accept the kind of love we believe we deserve, so in some cases I believe a lot of people lower their standards...
'We accept the love we think we deserve' — a famous quote written by Stephen Chbosky and one of my all time favorite quotes. I personally believe that this quote has a million different stories behind it, some, I am sure we as people can most definitely relate to. It is one of the trustiest sentences, ever spoken! I have only come into realization of this lately however, the more I think about my previous relationships and the way I was treated by my ex boyfriends the more I realize that I have lowered my standards in the past and it is because I have a massive issue with my self-confidence and when I have in the past met a nice man, who wants to treat me how a person deserves to be treated, (because I have, quite a few times too,) I have had a tendency to push this man away because I am scared he will one day leave me for someone better. I just don't feel good enough at all. I don't understand why a nice man would want to build up a future with me, when there is so many better girls out there, who could probably offer this man a lot more than I could.
These past few days I have come to the realization that it is all to do with your self-confidence and the kind of people you are involved with. I believe that if you are happy within yourself you are more likely to meet someone who will actually treat you right and you can feel comfortable in yourself with this. However, when you are feeling low in yourself, I believe that people have a huge tendency to latch onto someone who is giving them more attention than usual, even if I know they aren't the right person for them. Relationships never work when you rush into something, the problem is, with this generation of young people that we are all so desperate to fall in love and be loved in return, that we forget what we deserve... In conclusion lowering our standards and settling for someone that is no good for us at all, not even in the slightest.
I do in some sense believe that some people are the way that they are because they have been made to feel like they can do what they want, which then stops them from wanting to treat someone right. Well what's the point when they can treat someone wrong and get away with it? It does make sense. If someone knows that you will stick with them, no matter what they do, they are bound to take advantage of you and treat you wrong. I'm not saying I agree with it because I don't, not even for a second, but I am saying I understand why these people are the way they are. If we didn't let these people take advantage of us in the first place, they wouldn't be like that. Everything would be completely different if we all learned to raise our standards and begin understanding that we do deserve the best, and nothing less than the best.
I have always lowered my standards in previous relationships, I realize that now. I have always let my ex boyfriends take advantage of me, cheat on me and lie to me. I blame myself for all of that, I knew what they were doing but I chose to stay with them... Because, because, well that's what I honestly thought I deserved.
It's taken a lot of thinking and a lot of writing for me to realize why I am this way, and why I settled for these type of men. I have really low self esteem... I don't really understand the reasons why I am like this but it is just a part of who I am. I haven't helped my own cause really either, I usually jump into relationships when I can feel an attraction with someone, destroying it before it has the chance to flourish. The reason behind this is that I am absolutely terrified that I won't ever find the right person but I will, when the times right.
I have realized through experience that you cannot force anything, you cannot force something that was never there. Love is something that develops over time, it's not something you can jump into straight away.
'Love yourself first,' is vital when it comes to going into the right relationship. You will never, ever meet the right person if you don't love yourself because you will be forever lowering your standards. Believe me. You see all these married couples that aren't happy with one another, at all. Do you want to be like that? Do you want to settle for the first person that comes into your life? Or would you rather learn to be alone and in love with yourself first? I know what I would rather do. Loving yourself, is another subject I will be eventually writing about. It's vital in your own self-happiness.
Everything comes back down to the law of attraction, what we hold in our minds, we hold in our hands. We do, as people accept the love we think we deserve. I'm writing this post to try to help everyone realize that you do deserve the best! If you are not happy, you need to leave now, before it's too late. If you are unsure, you need to leave, because chances are there is someone out there, who is perfect for you and who you can be sure about! So what I am trying to express to you all is never, ever settle for anything less than what you deserve. You only have one life. Make it perfect for yourself.