I've realised what my depression and mania is. My depression and mania are not an excuse nor are they a crutch. They are not my future or my destiny.
I’ve come to the realization that depression is like a cancer. A foreign invader in the body that seeks to conquer and destroy. A terrorist at a cellular level. A type of biological torture that is impossible to see. We attempt to treat it the best we can, leaving the casualties where they call. Out of this darkness demons are expelled. And when you attempt to destroy it, you end up killing off pieces of yourself. You unwilling aid in your own destruction. I’m unsure what kind of God would create such a punishment for his creation to endure. Victims of our own biology and circumstance. We’re battling an enemy we can’t see, stabbing blindly in the darkness that is otherwise known as the human psyche. We bow to one another and clash in the battle of the mind and the soul, knowing the other has tricks hidden up his sleeve.