take me apart

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I felt like an emotional leper Leaving bits of myself here and there and them all being points on my time line of life. So... This poem.

 

I've been here before,
In this cold, grey house,
Frozen in time
And burning in my heart.

I left a piece of myself here,
In you,
In that deep chair where you love to sit,
And I poured my heart and soul all over you.
Until you and I were slathered
In all my sweet and sticky colours...

...and then,
after we'd stopped
laughing...
...crying...
...yelling
at one another
You primly pulled yourself back together,
And became Her,
And promptly made me
pick it up, pack it away.
But I think we missed some...
Some of me stayed there,
There, where we kissed,
And broke
and remade ourselves.

I have been here before,
And some of me still lives here
On this cliff-side,
Facing the Pacific,
Eyes searching,
Scouring the unseeable horizon.
Looking for you?
Me?
Yesterdays and tomorrows.
I don't know what or why
But I'm still there.
There with our boys,
Small and smaller,
One with hot chips in his eyes
And the other with a heart full of milk.
And us wrapped in the love
That we propagate and protect
Like rare orchids.

I lost something here
In this long concrete corridor,
With my teenage heart in the distance
Bobbing along like a helium balloon
At her shoulder,
And she oblivious of her every graceful move
Cutting me like razors,
In love with a face I would never have.

I am here every day,
I painted these walls with myself,
I painted my children.
They are smothered in me and my love,
So that when they are men,
They will carry on our tradition.
Attack hugs and family love.

 

 



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