How You Have Changed

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a soul in decline

Your eyes reveal a huge amount

Unblinking windows exposing your soul

I see beyond the mask, the chasm below

Deep into the caverns of your existence

The swirling blackness of putrid history

I baulk at your offerings

A silent matinee that shudders my spine

Yet I refuse to avert my gaze

Hypnotized by your despair

Ensnared by depravity and madness

 

What do I see?

Roaming freely without words

Infrequent imagery

Assembling like tumultuous thunderclouds

Decadence stirring, warning rumbles

A sea of debauchery and decay

I look closer

 

There is no pity

No salvation

Not even a faint glimmer of hope

The devil is mocking you

Pitchfork thrust into your charred heart

Unsavoury thoughts strewn like cancer

 

Laughing people grinding you down

Levity aimed at you ... or so you believe

A stranger's fleeting gaze

And paranoia runs amok

Sweat and shakes arise

You want to run; you want to retaliate

You want to scream your lungs dry

 

And those voices

Those terrible voices

Trapped inside your head

Like butterflies in a jar

The things they say

Reprehensible and sardonic

Barking out continuous hatred

Even during slumber

Repugnant nightmares

 

Your eyes stare with utter blankness

A milky gaze of acceptance

I see a creature of scant hope

A mind fraught and ragged

Seclusion compulsory

Just you and your inner-demons

 

You were such a happy child

Loved by all, cute and bubbly

An infectious laugh

A beautiful specimen

A little cherub with perfect dimples

Grand days

 

How you have changed

Slumped and defeated

A pale shadow of your former self

Fragile and cracked

A broken shell

Humpty fucking Dumpty

Impossible to put you together again

I  can stare at you no more

For my reflection haunts me far too much

 

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