On a down



See without being seen

I'm trapped inside the window.
Like a pathology slide.
I could make a histologist out of everyone who sees me,
But they don't.

So, here I am, in plane view,
In sagittal,
Any and every angle you want.
Here I am.
Come and dissect me.

I've got a voice, you know,
This one, that one,
Just facets,
They're all just facets.
Some of the light that enters me gets trapped inside.
Like my screams of anger and frustration,
But never my love.

This light is like me, trapped in this glass.

Trapped in this glass,
I can see everything,
I can hear everything,
But there's something,
Some THING between me and life.
And I'm always reaching out to it,
But never quite touching.

It is a silent war,
Silent and cold,
Sort of dead and pointless,
But I'm fighting it anyway,
because, fuck it, just fuck it.

This is a moment,
Just a snapshot, a portrait,
An art piece of me,
Not all of me,
No, not all,
There's ALWAYS The Bear, The Moo, The Cat.
Silver and golden dreams.

My heart. Oh my heart.

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There's more where that came from!