a girl's struggle with her sickness

in one hand some prescription pills and in the other a cup.
looking down in the sink at the blood that she just coughed up,
"here's to dying" she sings, as she washes them down with some water.
another day survived is just really another day closer.

her body is weakening, decaying — it's dying.
she'll learn soon if her sunday school teacher was lying.
but she feels that if centuries ago Jesus came back from the dead,
"how hard could it be, maybe i could pull it off again."

her head hangs down, she hates looking into the mirror.
afraid of the demon with bloodshot eyes who stares back at her.
this isn't how she thought that her life would end,
but apparently God has a funny way of showing His compassion.

grabbing the fine point pen that she borrowed from her mother,
and the empty journal given to her on her birthday from her brother.
tears from her eyes and blood from her lips stain the paper.
"i'm sorry. please forgive me. i'll love you both forever."

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