My explanation of incidental existence.
Is this optional?
"I'm afraid not."
You're going to make me?
"Already did but, you can re-invent yourself."
Seems like punishment. Am I bad?
"No, no, no, not bad at all, just not very good, yet."
Will it hurt?
"Well, yes but, pain is part and parcel of the project. Happens to each, pretty valuable actually, when used in conjunction with relative joy."
That's pretty cryptic. Fishspeak please.
"It's an acquired talent, you'll be fine".
You seem confident. I'm afraid.
"Also part of the package."
I feel like you're telling me everything AND nothing.
"Sounds familiar too, no?"
Yes, sort of like a lost piece of me was found and returned...
"There it is! Now you need only choose."
Wait! You said "not optional"!
"Oh, you're going, you just need to choose how."
My choice of transportation?
"Um, no. That's part of my job, you choose which form."
Now I'm confused again, you're sending me to Earth, home of humans, but, I'm not human?
"Not yet. Is that your choice?"
Whoa! Wait! What else can I be?
"Earth holds very diverse life, trees, animals, fungi, insects, water, fire air. You may start as any and become more."
So I don't have to be human?
"Right. Now, what are you?"
How do I choose?
"That, my curious friend, I cannot tell you. However, at this point, most everyone is at the mercy of humans and fire."
From what I've heard humans are trouble, now I'm really scared. They're in charge?
That sounds ominous.
"Well, maybe. It depends on how they work one thing."
One? What might that be?
"They call it "love". A really complex concept to explain but, most of it comes quite naturally and easily to most humans and, so far, they think only they can do it. Some have particular issues with certain parts, others take to it like a fish to water..."
I'm not a sophisticated soul and pretty intimidated by this "love" thing. Seems like a huge responsibility for a simple being such as me.
A fish to water? I like the sound of that...
"So be it"
Oh for fryin' up cod! A Catfish?!?!
"A special catfish."
Special schmecial! How so?
"I gave you love."
Oh great jellyfish jamboree in July!
I chose a fish to avoid complications! I thought, you know, Blue Whale, Great White, Marlin.
Something a little more grand!? What kind of guru guide are you? Why can't I just stay here?
How am I going learn to give "love"? IN HUMANITY!?
"...and receive. The catfish represents magic and humility, I'm not your guide, Namazu will be. I'm Towt Wwiff, the one with thumbs who writes inanities for fish and "the connector".
I'm not supposed to divulge this, all of you want to stay here but, this isn't anywhere, this is NOT
being. You all need to be. You'll see, and again, I think you'll do fine."
Thanks an ocean load. Can I change my mind?
"Nope. But you can re-invent yourself."
You said that. When?
"Anything you want."
"That's up to you."
You're not so helpful.
"Oh, you'd be surprised."
Well, then a fine, fat, white and black, animated, weird whiskered catfish I am, there it is,
Let's swim this fish!
"You're terrestrial as well."
You mean I'm all-terrain?!
"Yup, Space travel and anti-gravity too."
I can fly?! In space too!? How cool! What else?
Ouch! You just made that up.
"Yep, in you."
And what does that do?
"It's for engaging with the humans."
Gross! No one likes those things!
"Some you will, the rest won't matter. From those also chose you will learn your love."
Seems like a hit or miss proposition.
"You've no idea. Now, let's go before I change my mind."
You can change your mind but, I can't?
"Would you prefer as a sea worm?"
Okay, okay, let me grab my, wag, wink, grin, swim and SpLaSh!....