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I was torn between Opinion and Story with this one. :/

"Why are you seeking a fight?"

I warned him but he didn't listen.  

"But we're on the same team!"

I warned him but he didn't listen.

"Why are you accusing me of being lazy?"

I warned him but he didn't listen.

"Stop shouting imaginary scenarios at me!"

I warned him but he didn't listen.

*I threw an alarm clock at his head*

*He tossed my lil' one's only photo album down a muddy trail in the woods*

*I fire hot coffee at his face*

*He forcefully attempted to pry the wedding band off my finger*

*I flicked a cigarette at his face*

*He threw a laundry basket at my back*

*He packed his stuff and abandoned us for the 20th time*

*I took him back for the 20th time*

"Lemme tell you about my day at work."

I heard him but I didn't listen.

"So this is what the movie The Martian is all about..."

I heard him but I didn't listen.

"Would you like me to get us some iced coffees before you go to work this morning?"

I heard him but I didn't listen.

"We've grown apart, Karson."

"I know we have."

"Think we could still be friends?"

"No."

"We can meet at the courthouse this week and start the paperwork."

*He exited the room to cry into the sofa*

"Do you wanna talk about it, Karson?"

"No.  There's nothing I want to hear."

 

Ohhhhhhh, sweet, sweet irony.

 

 

 

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