It's hard to find the hard words to describe the ones we love, I hope these words can translate my feelings, my deep and sincere feelings to try filling the infinite hollow that remains with a great loss, never being fixed, not even close.
Too sad, you are gone, forever, you took my heart with you, my hope, my important being, because only you, only with you I felt myself important, you took my everything. Today I am only skin, hollow, emotionless, even far away it was divine to know you were breathing, somewhere in this world, it did not matter, you were breathing, even you being halfpenny, vengeful, there was no obstacle you could not overcome, there was not. I wanted you even being made of the poorest material, made of the worst kind of chita existent in the market, but you were dressing my soul, however, you put an end on your existence and penalised me by my lack of courage to be with you. If I hadn’t had been raised with so much hypocrisy, with so much preconception, with so many lies like was my education, I would have sent everything to hell and I would be at your side.
At this very moment I would exchange my entire life to be at least for 15 minutes, just me and you, so I would miss what I lived and not what could have been. I would have not the burden of my doubt, with this sensation to be missing something that I will never get back. Forgive me, I venerate you and I will always do it.
PS: This story illustrates the third part of PLATONIC LOVE’S TRILOGY where two people love each other platonically, but because an act of cowardice of one or both of them, they become unhappy when their love did not turn into a real thing.
Note: The word chita means a kind of fabric sold in Brazil, often with vivid colours, which has a very poor quality and it’s too cheap, probably similar to the chintz fabric.