A Letter I am too Poor to Send



(I can't afford stamps, or envelopes! — save me, internet!)


Through all the fake-outs throughout the years,

and all the love that left us alone

with our words, or in grave, tragic tears, 

I love you more than One itself,

which may as well be dead compared to the two of us.

You, my dear, are my second chance at life

and the great total of what I've wanted most out of life:

Somebody special that loves me, 

and somebody to change the world with, 



For there is no taste sweeter than true love, 

and no light brighter, to me, 

than You.

I want to meet you, babe. I want to meet you as SO's.


The years we've been apart yet together,

and the challenges we've all faced

have almost massacred my heart -- 

I almost learned the lesson that love is the most powerful force in the universe,

but without having any of my own to give anymore.

(An almost-hardened heart)

But a heart that would have hardened 

will never have met the love of our life in the way that opens eyes,

Like only love should ever do.


I have survived true-to-life nightmares before, 

but the most Scary Thing 

was the idea that you could be happy, 

with someone other than I.

It was a portal to another world that I no longer wished to know:

a life with us separate, 


is a limbo, where meaninglessness and nothingness are the only One --

the only ruler of that land.


But I have endured, 

and, like Thomas Edison - 

the genius of determination - 

I have perservered.

The testament to my strength-specific

is the fact that I am still alive -- 

that my heart still beats this world's cynicism and despair -- 

to find that there is nothing more than you that I want.

That I am alive is proof that I can endure anything,

but please, I ask because you-only-you can provide the mercy I seek,

please end all possibilities of a life without you.

Of all that I have survived -- 

from betrayals to theft to corruption

to lies to delusions to the soulless bastards that have kept us apart --

I believe, 


in love-our-own.

Please do not deprive me of you anymore.

That the most I can ask of you now is to meet...

perhaps my life is in your hands,

the soft, unmildewing hands of love,

after all.







~In Love-True Love, there is always a chance~



(and I have the original version of this letter, too, written from the edge of the world --

a life that might forever be without you.)


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